I'd like to hear a little bit about Japanese drinking culture, like: how do you invite people you have met but don't know really well to go to a restaurant or bar and eat and drink with you, while giving them plenty of opportunity to back out politely? What kinds of conversation is acceptable, for people who don't know each other real well, and for those that do? The Japanese seem to always have a correct way to do things, what are they for this kind of small group gathering (like no more than 6 people at max)? Any light you can shed on this before I get there and start observing in person? Just to be clear, I'm not asking for "Just say"iishoni nomimasen desu ka?"" type of answer. I want to know how to socialize with smart, mature young(er) people.

Thanks, peoples.

Would start with not inviting groups of people to go somewhere...

best to behave like a guest and quietly follow rather than turn up here and lead.

Sorry, I know that wasn't your intention.. but your western style stands out like dog's balls to someone living in Japan.

Just be as quiet as possible and follow what everyone else is doing.

Wait until you are invited.

Follow the conversation they start.. listening more than talking, of course.

The average newbie who comes here is usually too full on for the average Japanese person.

You should also watch all of these:
http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL54734B4601A97FC7&feature=view_all

Seem them- all of them. And yes, it was eye-opening. I also understand what you're saying, I had picked up on that kind of thing a bit from the playlist. Forgetting the invitation stuff for now, what is it like when they do go out to socialize? Admittedly this will require extremely large generalizations, even if you try to break it up into categories.

Here is a real thread.
Sorry about the spamming Chinese assholes, we are dealing with them now.

Would like to hear comments as to whether the "Bar Hostess" still exists. When I lived there in the 90s, the bar hostess was a pretty girl that sat with you and your male friends, poured your drinks and made conversation that was complementary to your looks, intelligence, job, etc. Her job was to make you feel good about yourself after a stressful day at work and before your train ride home. Usually a part-time job for a secretary or other junior worker, she was not a hooker and drank real drinks that you bought for her, not fake drinks as in a low-class bar.

Fantastic for a guy's ego!!

Sadly, yes.
"Companions" still exist.

If you can suspend reality and convince yourself they are telling the truth.. maybe it could be good for your ego..

But when you see them telling bald old salaryman losers the same thing.. they sort of lose credibility, don't they